I hate you Tuesday

I'm outside in my gazebo with the tiki torches lit. It's a cool 70 degrees here in Mira Mesa. The wireless router lets me use my netbook outside to blog. I couldn't ask for a much more peaceful environment.

Lan, who is like the younger sister who seems to know more about life than I do, stresses to me that positive thinking brings positive energy, and you can thus help decide if you're going to have a good day or a bad day.

This morning a motorcycle came out from between-lanes and out of my blind spot to almost crash into me as I made a slow lane change. He got upset, looked back at me, and mad dogged me for half a minute. I was scared so I looked forward and didn't say anything, not wanting to start a conflict. He began mouthing words to me that I couldn't understand, but I'm sure they were cuss words.

In my head I thought that if I said anything back, he'd come back and either bust my side mirror, or break a window. Those are things I did not have time to deal with, and seeing as I had "more to lose" than he did, I just sat idly.

I thought the idea was that you were to not waste your energy on useless people, and to let things go, because you'll be the better man. Those people are just angry people who have nothing better to do but to blow up little things.

I told myself that and continued on to work. The problem is that it didn't get any better; in fact all it did was make me feel worse. Why do I let people trample on my niceness? Lang put on her status update that she was tired of being nice. I get what that means: being nice means other people get to enjoy life while you sit here holding your god damn tongue because it's what's "right". Hey, who decided what's right and wrong anyway? Maybe I'm a dipwad who never puts up a fight and concedes everything out of fear.

I got to work, and I still didn't feel any better. I told this to Scott and Micha, and they both agreed that maybe I should have yelled back to at least vent some anger out.

I then pulled out my phone and it was Lan who said that she couldn't come over to game anymore. I was like, seriously Tuesday is starting to blow.

Work came and went. Well there was a meeting at work about our web editing project. My co-workers decided that I was clearly the best HTML writer they had; and that I would be the leader on the project. I was the hired young gun out of college who was slick enough to whip code into shape while listening to rap music and drinking Rockstar energy drinks. But today, some higher-ups thought that it wasn't in our best interests to be working on the HTML because we're not familiar enough with what the project requires. Hey, screw you.

I get off work and Lan says we can at least have sushi (she leaves in 2 days). During that time, I tell her that one of my guy friends has been asking for her number, and I jokingly said "sure I'll ask her", thinking she wouldn't say yes. Anyway she did end up saying yes, and I'm like, oh hell no it is NOT supposed to be that easy. Fuck that, it's supposed to take effort and shit and craploads of hoop jumping.

Lan has pretty much been one of my best friends the past few months and I really was upset that I was going to lose someone I trust confiding in. But to her that's being overly dramatic, and there's nothing to worry about.

I hate that. When someone calls someone overly dramatic, it means that the dramatic person is dumb and has invalid feelings. Like, god you're so dramatic. Stop being that way.

Anyway I felt pretty dumb at that point. After helping her run errands, I decided that today was a really shit day. The only thing to save it would be to go to Best Buy and buy myself something. Something nice. Something I have control of, and that won't judge you.

I started at the Samsung 46" LCD 1080P 120HZ tv for half an hour. I read up every spec on it, understood what each little knob and port did. I didn't buy it, but the associates let me know that I have a 30 day price protection guarantee against price matching if I need to do so. I'll go to Fry's tomorrow and see what we have.

I bought some milk and orange juice at Ralphs. That's pretty much the only thing that went right on Tuesday.

It's 12:39am out here in the gazebo. I should go back inside. Goodnight.

Guess who's back!

And has just set up their tower!

There are two parties this weekend, so I'm going to have to prepare for them. But on Monday, it's back to blogging. Get ready, people.